A00 - List Of Joke Types - funny videos jokes quotes yo mama humor knock knock racist dirty pranks in hindi chuck norris of the day for kids santa banta adult blonde hilarious Mexican tell me a joke bad momma good funniest shortsex intercourse best position suck penis big breasts virgin smooch vagina orgasm male masturbate dirty love sensual romance
Holding On
Q: What does one penny say to the other penny?
A: Let's get together and make some cents.
Q: What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide and drives women wild?
A: a $100 bill!
Q: What is Barack Obama's new slogan in these tough times?
A: Spare Change You Can Believe In!
Q: What is brown and has a head and a tail but no legs?
A: A penny.
Q: When does it rain money?
A: When there is "change" in the weather.
Q: Two coins add up to 30 cents, and one is not a nickel. What are they?
A: A quarter and a nickel. The quarter isn't a nickel.
Q: Why don't cows have any money?
A: Because farmers milk them dry.
Son: "Mom can I get twenty bucks"
Mom: Does it look like I am made of money
Son: "Well isn't that what M.O.M stands for?"
Q: Why did the man think he saw a ghost on Halloween?
A: A kid dressed up as a 401 (K)
Q: Why didn't the quarter roll down the hill with the nickel?
A: Because it had more cents.
Q: What do you call a blonde with a dollar bill on the top of their head?
A: All you can eat, under a buck.
Q: What did the midget say when I asked him for a dollar?
A: "Sorry, I'm a little short"
Q: What book do women like the most?
A: "Their husbands checkbook!"
Q: Why is there no gold at the end of the rainbow?
A: The Leprechan took it and sold it to Cash4Gold!
Q: Why are guys calling information in Bangkok?
A: To save money on phone sex!
Q: What happens when you give 61 dollars to a blonde?
A: She wants 8 (ate) more.
Q: How much money does a skunk have?
A: One scent!
Q: What did the cat say when he lost all his money?
A: I'm paw!
Q: What is the only way to keep your money from the casinos in Vegas?
A: When you get off the plane walk into the propellers!
Q: How is the moon like a dollar?
A: They both have 4 quarters.
Q: Why did the girl put two quarters in her ear?
A: To hear 50 Cent
Q: What coin doubles in value when half is deducted?
A: A half dollar.
Q: What have women and condoms got in common?
A: If they're not on your dick they're in your wallet.
Q: Why shouldn't you lend a anthropologist money?
A: They consider a million years ago to be Recent.
Q: What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man?
A: $4.99 a minute.
Q: Why can't Lebron James shop at the dollar store?
A: Because he only has 3 quarters!
Q: Why did the man keep throwing Monopoly Money at the stripper?
A: Because she kept putting fake tits in his face!
Q: What do stockbrokers say to each other when they want the other person to shut up?
A: Put a stock in it!
Q: How do you hide money from a hippie?
A: Put it under the soap.
Q: How do you know Nadya Suleman's (Octo-Mom) getting pretty desperate for money?
A: Four of her kids are already working for Nike!
Q: Why can't you borrow money from a Leprechan?
A: They're always a little short.
Q: How did Bernie Madoff get the idea for a ponzi scheme (where you use the money of new investors to pay off the older investors.)
A: Social Security!
Q: What is Alimony?
A: The screwing you get for the screwing you got!
Q: If marriage is grand what is divorce?
A: Ten grand!
Q: What do you call a man with a head full of change?
A: Headquarters.
Q: What did the cent say to the Dollar?
A: You make no cents.
Q: What do you call an Asian who's good at stock picking?
A: Cha-Chng
Q: Why is divorce so expensive?
A: Because it's worth it.
Q: How did the Banker die?
A: He Cashed Out
Q: Where do seagulls invest their money?
A: In the stork market!
Q: What do corn use for money?
A: Corn "Bread."
Q: Who makes more money a drug dealer or a prostitute?
A: A prostitute, because she can always wash her crack, and sell it again!
Q: Why did Bank Of America want to return all the government bailout money ASAP?
A: Because they were upset at all the hidden fees!
Q: What's the difference between the Chicago Bears and a dollar bill?
A: You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
Q: Do you know 50 Cent's half brother's name?
A: 25 Cent.
Q: What do you find in between the couch?
A: M&M's and fifty cent
Q: If Bill Gates collapses right in front of you, what's the first thing you do?
A: Grab his wallet.
Q: Where do penguins keep their money?
A: In a snow bank!
Q: Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
A: He wanted cold hard cash!
Q: How did Mitt Romney make hundreds of millions of dollars?
A: By turning $21 an hour jobs into $9 an hour jobs
Q: Why do Jewish guys watch porno movies backwards?
A: They like the part where the hooker gives the money back
Q: What's the difference between Former Mayor of Detroit, Kwame Kilpatrick, and a prostitute?
A: The prostitute gives value for the money she takes.
Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
Q: What do fish use for money?
A: Sand dollars!
Q: Where does a fish keep his money
A: In the River Bank!
Q: What's the difference between a counterfeit dollar and a skinny blonde?
A: One's a phony buck.
Whoever said money can't buy happiness, simply didn't know where to shop.
When I have money, I have nothing to buy. When I don't have money, I want everything.
Money is not the root of all evil, Jealousy is.
Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
Cocaine is God's way of saying you're making too much money.
If money is the root of all evil, then why do they ask for it in church?
If time is money are ATMs time machines
Love is gambling, not with money but with your heart. You can always get money back, but you might not get your heart back.
If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money id just laugh and search with them
If I had a dollar for every lie Mitt Romney tells the American people, I would be in his tax bracket
Roger Goodell: 'I've take more money away from black athletes than child support."
Two coins meet,the first coin said: Hi,I'm 20 cents.The second coin said:What a coincidence,I'm 20 cents too!
Funny part:COINcidence
funny videos jokes quotes yo mama humor knock knock racist dirty pranks in hindi chuck norris of the day for kids santa banta adult blonde hilarious Mexican tell me a joke bad momma good funniest shortsex intercourse best position suck penis big breasts virgin smooch vagina orgasm male masturbate dirty love sensual romance and yo mama jokes
A young child asked a woman how old she was. She answered, "39 and holding."
The child thought for a moment, then said, "And how old would you be if you let go?"
The child thought for a moment, then said, "And how old would you be if you let go?"
Q: What does one penny say to the other penny?
A: Let's get together and make some cents.
Q: What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide and drives women wild?
A: a $100 bill!
Q: What is Barack Obama's new slogan in these tough times?
A: Spare Change You Can Believe In!
Q: What is brown and has a head and a tail but no legs?
A: A penny.
Q: When does it rain money?
A: When there is "change" in the weather.
Q: Two coins add up to 30 cents, and one is not a nickel. What are they?
A: A quarter and a nickel. The quarter isn't a nickel.
Q: Why don't cows have any money?
A: Because farmers milk them dry.
Son: "Mom can I get twenty bucks"
Mom: Does it look like I am made of money
Son: "Well isn't that what M.O.M stands for?"
Q: Why did the man think he saw a ghost on Halloween?
A: A kid dressed up as a 401 (K)
Q: Why didn't the quarter roll down the hill with the nickel?
A: Because it had more cents.
Q: What do you call a blonde with a dollar bill on the top of their head?
A: All you can eat, under a buck.
Q: What did the midget say when I asked him for a dollar?
A: "Sorry, I'm a little short"
Q: What book do women like the most?
A: "Their husbands checkbook!"
Q: Why is there no gold at the end of the rainbow?
A: The Leprechan took it and sold it to Cash4Gold!
Q: Why are guys calling information in Bangkok?
A: To save money on phone sex!
Q: What happens when you give 61 dollars to a blonde?
A: She wants 8 (ate) more.
Q: How much money does a skunk have?
A: One scent!
Q: What did the cat say when he lost all his money?
A: I'm paw!
Q: What is the only way to keep your money from the casinos in Vegas?
A: When you get off the plane walk into the propellers!
Q: How is the moon like a dollar?
A: They both have 4 quarters.
Q: Why did the girl put two quarters in her ear?
A: To hear 50 Cent
Q: What coin doubles in value when half is deducted?
A: A half dollar.
Q: What have women and condoms got in common?
A: If they're not on your dick they're in your wallet.
Q: Why shouldn't you lend a anthropologist money?
A: They consider a million years ago to be Recent.
Q: What is it when a woman talks dirty to a man?
A: $4.99 a minute.
Q: Why can't Lebron James shop at the dollar store?
A: Because he only has 3 quarters!
Q: Why did the man keep throwing Monopoly Money at the stripper?
A: Because she kept putting fake tits in his face!
Q: What do stockbrokers say to each other when they want the other person to shut up?
A: Put a stock in it!
Q: How do you hide money from a hippie?
A: Put it under the soap.
Q: How do you know Nadya Suleman's (Octo-Mom) getting pretty desperate for money?
A: Four of her kids are already working for Nike!
Q: Why can't you borrow money from a Leprechan?
A: They're always a little short.
Q: How did Bernie Madoff get the idea for a ponzi scheme (where you use the money of new investors to pay off the older investors.)
A: Social Security!
Q: What is Alimony?
A: The screwing you get for the screwing you got!
Q: If marriage is grand what is divorce?
A: Ten grand!
Q: What do you call a man with a head full of change?
A: Headquarters.
Q: What did the cent say to the Dollar?
A: You make no cents.
Q: What do you call an Asian who's good at stock picking?
A: Cha-Chng
Q: Why is divorce so expensive?
A: Because it's worth it.
Q: How did the Banker die?
A: He Cashed Out
Q: Where do seagulls invest their money?
A: In the stork market!
Q: What do corn use for money?
A: Corn "Bread."
Q: Who makes more money a drug dealer or a prostitute?
A: A prostitute, because she can always wash her crack, and sell it again!
Q: Why did Bank Of America want to return all the government bailout money ASAP?
A: Because they were upset at all the hidden fees!
Q: What's the difference between the Chicago Bears and a dollar bill?
A: You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
Q: Do you know 50 Cent's half brother's name?
A: 25 Cent.
Q: What do you find in between the couch?
A: M&M's and fifty cent
Q: If Bill Gates collapses right in front of you, what's the first thing you do?
A: Grab his wallet.
Q: Where do penguins keep their money?
A: In a snow bank!
Q: Why did the man put his money in the freezer?
A: He wanted cold hard cash!
Q: How did Mitt Romney make hundreds of millions of dollars?
A: By turning $21 an hour jobs into $9 an hour jobs
Q: Why do Jewish guys watch porno movies backwards?
A: They like the part where the hooker gives the money back
Q: What's the difference between Former Mayor of Detroit, Kwame Kilpatrick, and a prostitute?
A: The prostitute gives value for the money she takes.
Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.
Q: What do fish use for money?
A: Sand dollars!
Q: Where does a fish keep his money
A: In the River Bank!
Q: What's the difference between a counterfeit dollar and a skinny blonde?
A: One's a phony buck.
Whoever said money can't buy happiness, simply didn't know where to shop.
When I have money, I have nothing to buy. When I don't have money, I want everything.
Money is not the root of all evil, Jealousy is.
Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?
Cocaine is God's way of saying you're making too much money.
If money is the root of all evil, then why do they ask for it in church?
If time is money are ATMs time machines
Love is gambling, not with money but with your heart. You can always get money back, but you might not get your heart back.
If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money id just laugh and search with them
If I had a dollar for every lie Mitt Romney tells the American people, I would be in his tax bracket
Roger Goodell: 'I've take more money away from black athletes than child support."
Two coins meet,the first coin said: Hi,I'm 20 cents.The second coin said:What a coincidence,I'm 20 cents too!
Funny part:COINcidence